This is quite possible the greatest thing we have ever come across on the Internet. May is the National Masturbation Month. We never knew there was a designated time period for this art which is why we have been practicing all year long. So grab your lotion and tissue and let's get started.
Take that, Salma Hayek's Lawyers. We have one month to do community service and promote naughty Salma Hayek's picts!
Anyone wanna see Salma dressed up as a naughty nurse? Check her new movie here!
Anyway, back to the situation at hand. While we don't think it's legal to just go out in public and pull out your peskie and whack-it, we do recommend checking with the dude's at masturbate-a-thon for a very public gathering of guys and gals that want to celebrate self-love, and God bless them all!
Jackie Guerrido, an advocate of National Masturbation Month
Good Vibrations, the founder of National Masturbation Month, is hosting a masturbate-a-thon in San Francisco on May 27. The self-love marathon offers semi-private men’s and women’s sections, a public mixed section, and a stage for a live webcast on Bondage.com. With participants getting sponsored for each minute of masturbation, the event raises money for the Center for Sex and Culture, a nonprofit group dedicated to safe sex and general sex education. Holy Shit! These people are technically paid atheletes! They've gone pro! Think of all those years of training we've put in and we could've been saving up for a championship.
Just in case you need help!
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