The Seventh Annual Masturbate-a-Thon Comes to San Francisco

5/03/2007 | Labels: , , |

This is quite possible the greatest thing we have ever come across on the Internet. May is the National Masturbation Month. We never knew there was a designated time period for this art which is why we have been practicing all year long. So grab your lotion and tissue and let's get started.

Take that, Salma Hayek's Lawyers.

We have one month to do community service and promote naughty Salma Hayek's picts!

Anyone wanna see Salma dressed up as a naughty nurse? Check her new movie here!

Anyway, back to the situation at hand. While we don't think it's legal to just go out in public and pull out your peskie and whack-it, we do recommend checking with the dude's at masturbate-a-thon for a very public gathering of guys and gals that want to celebrate self-love, and God bless them all!

Jackie Guerrido, an advocate of National Masturbation Month

Good Vibrations, the founder of National Masturbation Month, is hosting a masturbate-a-thon in San Francisco on May 27. The self-love marathon offers semi-private men’s and women’s sections, a public mixed section, and a stage for a live webcast on Bondage.com. With participants getting sponsored for each minute of masturbation, the event raises money for the Center for Sex and Culture, a nonprofit group dedicated to safe sex and general sex education. Holy Shit! These people are technically paid atheletes! They've gone pro! Think of all those years of training we've put in and we could've been saving up for a championship.
Since it's first year, Masturbate-a-Thons have raised over $25,000.00 from over 1,700 pledged participants from six different countries. Trophies were awarded to stand-out [stand-up?] participants and in 2006 participants for Longest Time Spent Masturbating (Male: 8.5 hours and Female: 6.5 hours), and Most Orgasms (Male: 6 and Female: 49). For 2007, a new record category has been established: Greatest Ejaculation Distance...


Just for the record, ...92 1/2 inches.



Just in case you need help!

Practice makes perfect.

To celebrate the glory of the Masturbation-A-Thon we have a few posts that should help you get geared up!

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)
Dave and Thomas will spam your computer with awesomeness when you hit up our archive. Start with hitting the "OLDER POSTS" link above to fly through weeks of mindless timekillers!
Your Ad Here